Depression – University of Life

Pain is a Problem (and your brain loves problems)

July 30, 2016July 30, 2016
by Shaun Roundy

Today’s podcast discusses the ups, downs, and outs of the problem of pain. Without problems to solve, life would get dull fairly quickly, but when you don’t know to address problems productively, then all you get from them is stress, anxiety, and depression. Adding one more secret ingredient changes everything, so listen up and find out what it is!

With practice, you’ll develop the one character trait that makes life easier and more enjoyable, despite challenges.

Depression

You Are Needed

June 13, 2015April 15, 2016
by Shaun Roundy

I once heard a story wherein a fairy had become entangled in a hedge. A kind girl set her free and the fairy granted her a wish.

“I want to always be happy,” the girl declared, at which the fairy flitted up to her shoulder and whispered something in her ear. The girl looked surprised, and the fairy flew away, never to be seen again.

Well, the girl lived a long, satisfying life, and her wish came abundantly true. The tale of the fairy’s wish circulated among her family and friends, but no one knew what the fairy had whispered in her ear.

As she lay dying with her adoring family gathered around her hospital bed, a granddaughter took her hand and asked what several of them had wondered for years. “Grandma, what did the fairy tell you that made you so happy all your life?”

The old woman turned toward her granddaughter and caressed her cheek lovingly. “She told me,” she said slowly, “‘Everyone needs you.’”

With that, she closed her eyes, expelled a final breath, and passed from this life with a contented smile on her face.

When you understand that everyone does need you, when you start looking for what you can give and how you contribute to the lives around you by simply being yourself rather than imagining their criticisms and complaints, then you let love instead of fear permeate your life, and that guarantees more love and abundance than any outward blessing could ever accomplish.

[This article comes from chapter 5.49 “You Are Needed” of Heal Your Mind: A Practical Guide to Speaking Your Brain’s Languages and Turing Pain into Power by Shaun Roundy]

SLIDER

Where do you fall on the “You Are Needed” love slider?


1: Nobody needs me. In fact, the world would be better off if I didn’t exist.	3: Sure, people need me, but only for the work I do, and anybody could replace me if I was gone.	5: Some people sorta need me, but they don’t really care about me. They just use me because I’m convenient.	7: Only my close friends need and love me. That’s good enough.	10: Everybody needs me whether they know it or not. They’d be okay without me, but their world would be diminished without me to brighten it up!

11. Going to extremes: some people glean their sense of value from being needed. They continually check how others react to them (and project their worries onto others) and how many “likes” they get on Facebook to determine whether they’re safe and accepted. Your sense of value should be intrinsic for best effect. Accept yourself unconditionally and go forward from there.

FOR DISCUSSION

What’s your most valuable contribution to the world? How does with your mere presence influence others?

How could loving yourself more make you even more important and needed to others?

HOMEWORK

Serve strangers in small or large ways and notice the difference you make. What would happen if everyone did that?

Serve yourself – do something that makes you truly happy – and notice how your cheerfulness affects others.

Confidence

Heal Your Mind

October 8, 2014September 14, 2015
by Shaun Roundy

UPDATE: the book is finished and you can find it here: Heal Your Emotions

I’ve been working on writing my next book, which will be one of the best and most important things I’ve ever created. It’s (tentatively) called Basic Intuitive Energy Healing ::: Heal Your Mind ::: A Scientific Approach to Speaking your Brains’ Languages and Turning Pain into Power and it includes over 50 simple yet highly effective healing techniques that you can use on yourself (or if you’re already a skilled energy healer, you can apply them to others for good effect).

I’ve been wanting to write it for about ten years, but the time wasn’t right until now. In hindsight, the reason is obvious – I thought I knew a lot ten years ago, and I did, but I’ve learned so much just in the past year that the book will now be far more complete and useful than it would have been then.

Here’s the introductory story which gives a general idea of what the book is about, and stay tuned as I reveal more details soon!

Once upon a time, you found yourself wandering through a deep, dark woods. You didn’t know exactly where you were headed, but hurried along the path just the same, hoping to escape the unpleasant shadows and the too-cool breeze that made you wrap your arms tightly around yourself and shiver.
Out from the darkness came distant, unpleasant voices in faint, scarcely-audible whispers. “You’re not good enough,” they said, “why even try? You’re a fool if you think you’ll ever be happy again!”
“Nobody loves you,” others murmured. “You’re all alone. You’ll always be alone.”
You pretended to ignore the voices as you hurried along, but deep inside, you knew they were right. Read more “Heal Your Mind” →

Confidence

How to Repulse Energy Vampires

April 24, 2014April 24, 2014
by Shaun Roundy

“Mmmm,” the vampire thinks to him/herself while looking over your glowing aura, “that much energy could sustain me for months!”

Your happy smile slowly fades as dark clouds creep across the bright morning sky. You don’t understand why you’ve begun feeling more down than usual lately. Nothing is actually wrong, nothing you can name; life should continue going great! But it’s just…not, exactly. You feel more tired and less optimistic than usual. If only you could shake off this miasm, then you could get back to being your normal, cheerful, productive self.

Some energy vampires are overt and obvious. They complain. They undermine every effort with negativity and pessimism. They criticize, blame, and argue. Such incessant actions create a heavy iron anchor that you must drag behind you if you can’t avoid them. “See?” they ask as you grow weary and irritable from carrying their load, “didn’t I tell you how awful the world is?” Read more “How to Repulse Energy Vampires” →

Balance

Depression is Simple

April 16, 2014April 17, 2014
by Shaun Roundy

Here’s the simplest & most helpful explanation of depression you’ll ever read:

Depression happens when life tips too far away from the light for too long, and your heart and mind take a partial vacation.

Depression is a safety valve, like when you turn on too many appliances in your home and blow a fuse. If your system didn’t partially shut down, your overloaded circuits would have experienced a worse melt down later on. Read more “Depression is Simple” →

Depression

Thinking Distortions

April 10, 2014April 16, 2014
by Shaun Roundy

seeclearly If you ever find yourself feeling frustrated that things aren’t working out better or suffer from any degree of anxiety, depression, or low self esteem, then there’s a strong chance it has something to do with Cognitive Distortions. If you’ve never heard of these pesky bad habits, then you’ve been missing out on a huge opportunity to make your life better and easier!

To be concise, thinking distortions are ways we sometimes think that – when you actually think about them – make no sense and often destroy your mood, motivation, and chance at living a happy, successful life.

Read through the list below and see which patterns you recognize in your life. Sometimes merely recognizing irrational thoughts when they happen provides enough clarity for you to stop thinking that way.

In case that’s not enough, we’ll also provide examples of more accurate, balanced perspectives. Get in the habit of correcting your own thinking distortions each time you catch yourself making one. It may seem difficult at first, but turns easy as soon as you create some new neural pathways in your brain.

If you want even more help to correct your thought habits, then order The Feeling Good Handbook, by Dr. David Burns, who pioneered this topic. He provides a helpful worksheet where you:
1. Write down your thought/perception.
2. Write how much you believe that thought (for example, 85%).
3. Identify which of the following thinking distortions apply.
4. Write how much you believe the thought *now* (for example, 15%).
This is a surprisingly effective exercise. You can usually buy the book for a few dollars on Amazon.

All-or-nothing thinking: seeing things in black or white as opposed to shades of gray; thinking in terms of false dilemmas and false dichotomies. Often involves using terms like “always”, “every” or “never” when this is not true.
Example: when an admired person makes a minor mistake, the admiration is turned into contempt.
Reconsider: does that sound realistic? Maybe you saw one example where that seemed to happen, but did all the admiration vanish? What about all the others who make mistakes and are not despised? Look around and gather more evidence.
Correction: we all make mistakes (haha, there’s a harmless all-or-nothing thought that empowers instead of disempowering!) and just because I made one today doesn’t mean I didn’t do a lot of other things well and come out ahead for the day! I’m a fabulous person! Read more “Thinking Distortions” →

Courage

Podcast: Good and Hard

March 13, 2014August 14, 2014
by Shaun Roundy

In our first University of Life podcast, we interview an extended family – a first-time mother, a survivor, a young cowboy, and an accidental jailor – about some of their most difficult experiences and seek to answer and explain the question “Is bad good?”

We’d love to make a habit of creating thought-provoking podcasts like this, so if you enjoy it or find it helpful, please say so in one of the comment sections below! Thanks! Your feedback matters!

A big thanks to Marilee, Kirsten, Chris, Preston, Emily, Tiffany and Jeri! You made it great.

Would your business like to sponsor this show? Send us a message and we’ll tell you how.

Depression

Top Ten Depression Cheats

March 10, 2014April 11, 2014
by Shaun Roundy

xboxroomates I’ve never considered myself a gamer, but I was wrong. It turns out that life itself is a game. In fact, it’s a whole series of games, and we all play them nonstop.

These games aren’t a waste of time, either; they happen to be the best way to learn life’s lessons – which is the whole reason we’re alive on this earth in the first place. The sooner we realize that life is a game and play to win, the better everything will go for us.

These games are so utterly immersive and realistic that you’d think they came from a hundred years in the future. Some of the games are exciting, some are scary or fun, easy or challenging, some we play in groups, others make us feel like we’re playing alone, even though we never are. We’re all always interconnected in subtle ways and everything we think, feel and do matters.

One of the least popular of these learning games called Depression. No one enjoys it, no one chooses to play, but life doesn’t always let us decide which games shows up on our screen. If we need lessons that Depression can teach, we may find ourselves trapped inside until we find our way out.

The worst thing about depression is that it’s more complex than meets the eye, and we often get stuck because we don’t know the secrets to beat its many levels. This article reveals the most useful of these secrets; the cheats to help you level up, to find your way through so you can finally win, move on, and play something more enjoyable with your life.

LEVEL 1: Relax

When you first enter the game, you find yourself at dusk, at 20,000′ on a snowy mountainside, and your challenge is to reach the summit. Light and color drain from the sky. The air grows uncomfortably thin and dangerously cold. Your first instinct is to run up the snowy ridge and get this stage over with as quickly as possible, but when you try, you instantly feel nauseous and fall to your knees, gasping for breath. You might even tumble down the mountain, making matters even worse. Read more “Top Ten Depression Cheats” →

Category: Depression

FOR DISCUSSION

HOMEWORK